Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Top Four Crazy Things About Catsitting For My Dad's Cat Maxx: # 3 The Memo


My dad leaves us a memo every time we cat sit for him. Some of it regards watering plants and taking the garbage out, but mostly it's about Maxx. And Dad, if you're reading, you KNOW this is funny.

Here is a sample:

Memo

1. Maxx (the usual): Leave Maxx in if you are gone for a long time.

His vet is Doc (make up name): (make up phone number). After hours clinic is (make up another phone number)

You know how to feed Maxx. Food and vitamins. (I am skipping part of this because it is for tomorrows blog). Now, he has all sorts of treats in the 3rd drawer down you can give him a few times a day. He loves the Greenies. The latter are good for his teeth and he should get 12 or so a day. They can be used to tempt him to come into the house. (The section about the Greenies is highlighted)

Leave our bedroom door open as he likes to sit on the bedroom love seats outside and inside bedroom proper.

Leave him in at night in the computer room. Do no let him out after 8 PM so you can get him in before bedtime.

He drinks out of the guest bathroom. Leave lid up and flush twice to insure clean water.

Mary and Rachel: pet him a lot. Keep his toys visible and, if you want, use the mitten to brush him and the vibrator. (no I'm not making this shit up)

Directions regarding boarding Maxx

Maxx has a reservation at the Puget Sound Pet Pavilion (address, phone and directions follow)

Maxx is also scheduled for a bath and trim (that's all). You can pay the boarding by credit card, but the groomers want cash or check. Mom will leave some. When you get him, make sure they have returned his collar. I once had to go out there and get it because they did not put it back on after his bath.

SPECIAL ALERT REGARDING MAXX
He has been constipated lately. I assume you do not want to be pulling crap out of his ass (you will know when he needs it by the painful meowing and hissing), so I have some medication. It is on the counter with this other meds and vitamins. I have figured out the meds. Too much diarrhea; not enough constipation. So, one little dollop on your finger tip every other day is the ticket. It must taste good, as he licks it right off. I did it on Mon. and Wed. So I suggest you do so before and after his trip to the kennel and on Tuesday the 13th. Thanks. (then he goes on to talk about the stuff I'm using tomorrow again) He has treats in the 3rd drawer, but only really likes the Greenies. You can give him a dozen pierces a day or a bit more.
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My Dad. He's awesome.

John Messina, Personal Injury Attorney

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