Monday, February 16, 2015


So, if you are friends with me on Facebook, you'll know that I lost my job last week. It was Monday, I was on vacation, and it royally sucked.

I've been pretty much wallowing in self pity for days, resigned to writing off last week as a "nothing" week. Now I need to shake the pity party off, get my shit together and get moving.

I absolutely loved the work I did at the law firm. It was always challenging, always fast paced, never boring. (okay, sometimes not boring) Now what am I going to do. I would really like to stick with marketing if I can, but those jobs are pretty scarce, still, that's what I'm going to look for first.

This has been an interesting experience so far. I've applied for unemployment, which wasn't difficult at all until I had to call in my claim for the week. I recommend finding out what questions they are going to ask you before calling in. I was totally confused with the whole, you got paid some money, how much? I didn't have my paperwork in front of me, I didn't understand the questions. ARG!! It took me like 6 calls to get it right.

I also have to get some paperwork signed by my doctor, because with my fatigue condition the way it is now, I do not see myself being able to work full time. I will try for sure if needed, but I'd rather be trying to find another part time or telecommuting job that fits my health needs at the moment.

I also signed up for Obamacare because my medical will run out at the end of March. I guess I'm in the  "pathetic" category now that I'm unemployed and get to get it cheap.

And today, well, today I scoured through probably 200 job postings on various websites, Flex, Indeed, Monster, Career Builder, Craigslist...I've not applied yet. I've just been gathering them up to see which ones I would prefer to apply for first.

I have to do 3 job related activities to keep my unemployment going. Either contact employers for jobs or doing these work related activities in the Work Source program, or a combo of both. The Work Source stuff are workshops, job fairs and the like, to get me closer to my employment goals, I guess. A lot of it I really don't need, but I did find a couple of their classes to suit my needs. They have an orientation, stress management seminar, and jump starting your own business that look good.

I've dusted off my resume and added new skills and experience and created a cover letter. So, I guess I'm as ready as I'm going to be.

It's terrifying. I'm downtrodden. I was good at what I did and now I feel like I have to start all over.

I'm still planning to start the marketing business with my friend from my old job. And I'm still writing, so it would be great if one of those would actually pan out for me. I seriously do not like working for other people since having my own business in the 90s. There is a certain freedom you get with becoming your own boss, even if you are working your tail off.

So anyhoo, that's what I've been up to. It's going to be all work and job searching for me for awhile. So if you don't see (or hear) from me, you know what I'm doing.

Have you ever lost a job in your adult life? How did you handle it? Are you better off now? Do you like where you ended up?

Saturday, February 14, 2015

Love is in the air

For some of you, I guess. Not me. I've not had a boyfriend in over six months now. Yes. I think that could be a record folks. None of them were ever the right fit, I suppose. Well, I thought one was, but he had other ideas.

Why don't any of them work? Here's the thing with me...I'm a very passionate person. I believe in love. I want to be in love again some day. When I meet someone and fall for them, I fall hard and fast. Probably too fast, and most of them seem to be the same way. So you get two people jumping into a committed relationship at break neck speed and what do you get? A break up.

I've learned that if I want to find the "one," I need to take my time. I need to be patient. Things that look good on the outside, or initially, usually end up being not quite what you expected, or not quite what you truly want. (okay, me. I'm talking about me)

So what am I looking for? I suppose since I was married for close to two decades and have dated a lot, I have figured out what works and what doesn't work for me. These are some of the things I'm looking for...

  • A nice face. It doesn't have to be a supermodel face, just a pleasant one with a nice smile.
  • A sense of humor. If I can't laugh at you, or near you, you're no good to me.
  • Brains. Not in the zombie sense, but Jesus, please be able to carry on a conversation.
  • Job, car, home of your own. Be able to support yourself, drive yourself and either don't live with mom, or make it so I'm able to kick you out of my house if I need some alone time.
  • Promptness. A little late is fine, but seriously, anything past 15 minutes is agro.
  • Your pets...I used to not want to date someone with pets, but soon realized that cut the dating pool down by like 75% So if you have pets, keep them clean, keep your house vacuumed and try not to let it lick me, jump on me, or sniff my crotch or butt. Big turn off, plus, allergies. And if it gets far enough that I'm sleeping over, I do not want to share you or your bed with your animal.
  • I used to want to not date anyone with kids under the age of 12. I mean, my kids are nearly adults and I don't need babysitters or to find care for them if I want to skip town (the latter is the same way I feel about pets). I'm flexible on the age thing now. Depends on the kid and the parent. If your kid is a brat, more than likely, our parenting skills may not mesh and I won't like your kids and I'll be out of there before I can say, let me get my coat.
  • Don't be cheap. I like to go out. I'm not saying you have to pay every time, I'm perfectly fine with paying 50% of the time (when I have a job, I just lost mine, but I intend to be back to work asap). So, you take me out, I'll take you out.
  • Be an equal partner. I'm not to be controlled. I'm not to do your bidding (babysitting, housework, laundry, etc.) These things are a joint venture.
  • Give me my space. I'm in my 40s and have been divorced now for nearly 5 years. I like time to write, exercise, binge watch shit on Netflix, go out with the girls, go for girl will not always be invited. Have a hobby and friends so you can do your thing while I'm doing mine.
  • Embrace the "F" word because you will hear it come from my mouth.
  • Don't force your religion on me. I don't do religion.
That's about it. That's not too high maintenance, is it? Maybe it will happen some day, or maybe I'll become a crazy cat lady. Who knows?

Tell me what you want in a person.

Okay, gotta go. Spending Valentines with two chicks and some lobster tail.

Happy Valentines Day. Stay safe.

My Dad. He's awesome.

John Messina, Personal Injury Attorney

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