Showing posts with label douchebag. Show all posts
Showing posts with label douchebag. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

Road rage and other horror stories

Yes, I was the victim of road rage yesterday. I was driving home from the *gasp* mall. God, I loathe the mall. Anyway, I was on the highway and it was pretty well packed as it was rush hour I have 5 million cars in front of me and a white van behind me following very close. The cars in front of me brake, so of course I break because, duh, I'm not an idiot, forcing the guy behind me to slam his brakes on because, as I said, he's following very close.

Apparently he did not like this. Oh no. He continues to follow behind me.  As soon as the HOV lane opens up to my left, that's High Occupancy Vehicle for those who are acronymically challenged, he speeds over, though I notice he does not have a passenger, tsk, tsk, and as soon as he passes me, gets back in front of me and slams on his brakes.

Wow, mature much.

I flip him off.

Wow, mature much.

He then moves into the right lane allowing me to pass then gets behind me. Then when I get into the right lane, because eventually I have to exit, he gets behind me. So now the King of Douchebagastan is following me.

You see, I'm not an idiot 1 of 5 things could happen here.

  1. He could actually continue to follow me, so of course I'm not going home, I'm going to the police station which is approximately .5 miles from my house.
  2. He could rear end me, which would be really stupid as I'm the daughter of one of the best personal injury attorneys in the state and I also work for him. He would unwittingly be totally screwed.
  3. He could shoot me dead. Then I would be totally screwed, but he probably would too because the intersection I'm stopping at is a busy one and he'd get caught.
  4.  He could do serious harm to me, but let me live. See # 3.
  5. He could take his empty threats and kiss my ass because he's nothing more than a bully being a douchebag.
He chose 5. When I got to my exit, I got into the exit lane and he followed behind me. As soon as the exit lane separated from the rest of the highway, he jerked his van back onto the highway. Ooooh, scary man in a work van.

I am sorry that guy was having such a bad day that he felt the need to tailgate me in the first place, then be a complete ass when I had to put my brakes on. I mean, his day must have been from hell. Either that, or he's just a douche. I'm going to give him the benefit of the doubt and hope it's the former.

I recently read a quote I like.

Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be nice.

I'm going to try to remember than when I meet up with people like my road rage guy.

Happy Tuesday.

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Writing Wednesday: A Tattered Life


I posted part of this on my Facebook a couple days ago, got some positive comments, so thought I'd post it here. 



Setting it up a bit, this is my book about a journal that travels some miles in a tornado and ends up in the hands of a teenage boy, Jaden Hatch. The journal is written by a girl down on her luck, who at first Jaden thinks of as a loser, but eventually becomes attached to.  Jaden is a douchebag, cheats on his beautiful girl friend, Ava, with Payton, a girl he considers white trash, he's a bully, homophobic and takes his mother, who has raised him alone for granted.  It's prom night and he and best friend Eli are going to pick up their tuxes.

I realize I never asked Payton if she was going to the dance. I’m curious. I text her. Will I c u 2 nite? I throw on sweats and shoes, grab my keys and take off for Eli’s. Time to pick up the tuxes. When I get to his house, I check my phone to see if Payton has texted back. Nothing.
Eli jogs out, dressed much the same as me, and we head to one of the only two tuxedo rental shops in town, Threads. On the way, I say, “You know, you should officially make Maddy your girl tonight.” Maddy is Eli’s prom date and happens to be Ava’s best friend. It would be perfect.
Eli turns to me, lowers his head, raises his an eyebrow and says, “No thanks.”
“But dude. She’s smokin’ hot. And that ass?”
“Again, no.”
“Why?”
“She’s not my type.”
I look over at him to see if he’s full of shit. He looks dead serious. “Are you kidding me? Maddy is everyone’s type.”
“Not everyone.” I shake my head, not believing what I’m hearing.
We enter Threads, and though there’s a line, we’re helped immediately because, well, I’m Jaden Hatch. We pick up our tuxes, mine, black, black shirt with a red vest and tie. Eli’s is all white with a pink vest and bow tie. “You know how gay you look in that?”
“Fuck you, Hatch,” is all he has to say to that. I drop him off and go home.
“Let’s see it!” Mama calls right when I walk in the door.
“Can’t you just see it later?”
Brows wrinkled, pouty lip in full action she says, “I just want a sneak peek.” 
“Fine,” I say rolling my eyes.
I go to my room and lay the tux on my bed. Before taking it out to Mama I check my phone one more time for messages. Have a couple silly texts from Ava about how excited she was about prom, which I care little about and immediately delete. Then Why aren’t u texting me back? Again, delete. Then there was one from Payton. Not if I c u 1st. Lol.
Cute.
 I unzip the plastic sheath that reminds me of those bags they put dead people in; I pull it off, and when I take the tux out to Mama, she squeals and claps, jumping up and down like a child. When she stops, tears well up in her eyes and she says, “You’re going to look so handsome.” She gawps into my face. “When did you get so old?” She reaches up to brush some hair out of my eyes and I playfully swat her hand away.
“Oh Mama, you’re being silly.”
She wipes her tears away. “Maybe. Now go get your chores done before you run out of time.”
“You’re making me do chores today?”
“Did I stutter? Is it your birthday or some kind of national holiday? No. It’s prom. Now get your ass going.”
“Yes, Ma’am.” I hang the tux up in the kitchen doorway.
“Okay, have fun, now. I’m headed to work.”
“Wait. What? Work?”
As she grabs her purse Mama says, “Yes, boy, how do you think that tux and tonight’s dinner and limo are getting paid for. Mom doesn’t stand for Made Of Money. I’ve had to pull extra shifts at the hospital. Make sure Ava’s parents take lots of pictures. Have them text me some.”
Saying nothing, I stand there, nodding stupidly as she leaves. I’m dumbfounded. Mama’s never missed any of the important events in my life, not a football game, an awards assembly…a formal dance. She works a lot, but her nursing job is flexible and she usually takes time off or switches with someone—she doesn’t grab her purse and walk out the door.
I do my chores, and not the half-assed job I normally do, but I do them meticulously because suddenly I’m realizing what Mama sacrifices for me. Maybe I’m still being a prick because this time I see how it affects me, I don’t know, but at least I’m finally noticing, right?


My Dad. He's awesome.

John Messina, Personal Injury Attorney

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