Thursday, January 9, 2014

Facebook Posts: Are they really THAT insufferable?

A couple days ago an article titled 7 Ways to Be Insufferable on Facebook surfaced on the Huffington Post. Some people took this to be sarcastic, and some took the writer to be a total douche. Either way you look at it, certainly some people are truly bugged by what people post on Facebook while others don't care one way or the other. Let's discuss what was discuss in the article, shall we?

1) The Brag
Okay, so some people brag on Facebook. Oh wait, I'm sorry, ALL people brag at
some time or another, and why not? Sometimes awesome things happen and everyone should know about. I got a book published. Um, that's kind of a big deal.

However if I were to be a habitual braggert, that would be annoying. It would also tell people my life actually sucks. We all know that people that talk themselves up that much actually have very boring, uneventful lives and just like to make us thing their lives are more exciting then they really are.

The article takes the time to splitting the braggerts into three subsections, but who really cares?  Like I said, everyone does it whether they are overt about it or do it in a quiet manner.

I will say this about the "relationship bragger" - you are annoying. Especially if all you do is fawn all over your loved one. Get over it. It's just another relationship that you'll grow complacent with someday like everyone else unless you actually take the steps to keep it exciting and passionate and continually posting about it on Facebook isn't going to do it.

2) The Cryptic Cliffhanger
Admittedly, I have been guilty of this. But I honestly don't do it because I want people coming to my page to give me virtual hugs and fling invisible cupcakes or wine bottles in my general directions, more so because I'm wallowing in self pity and find it entertaining.

If you're not doing it for the same reasons I'm doing it than stop 'sighing' 'ughing' and telling everyone you're 'struggling' today unless you're going to expand on it. I usually have no qualms telling people how shitty my day was.

If you need attention go to your shrink or your mom. If you want cupcakes go to the bakery, if you need a drink go to the bar on the corner. That's what I do.

3) The Literal Status Update
Okay, sometimes we need to be accountable to someone. Do we really need to get this nitpicky? I mean, yes, I've been literal on my Facebook page. I've posted my to do list. I think that's about it though. I mean, I have posted other things, like, "I'm eating a salad." But that's more to be funny and make fun of people who are really posting literal status updates. So don't do that. Unless like me you want to be accountable for something, then it's okay...because I said so, that's why.

4) The Inexplicably-Public Private Message
I have found this mostly done by stupid people, people who have no idea how to use social media, or people who are new to Facebook and have no idea what they're doing. Of course the article also thinks you should post on someone's page, "I miss you when are we hanging out?"

Um, why not? What are we supposed to post on people's pages then? Just political propaganda and pictures of funny cats?

5) The Out-Of-Nowhere Oscar Acceptance Speech
Sometimes people just need to show some love to no one in particular. Is that so wrong? I mean, sometimes just having all these people on Facebook reading your posts or stalking your pictures is enough to get you through the day, isn't it? I know it is for me.

6) The Incredibly Obvious Opinion
Okay, I think the person who wrote the article is a douche about this one. I think solidarity and compassion is a good thing. Coming together as a community, country, whatever, in the face of tragedy isn't always a bid for attention or narcissistic. Sometimes it is just genuine sympathy and an appeal for fellowship. Screw you.

7) The Step Toward Enlightenment
Um, yeah, I admit, these irritate me. Next! 

Oh, I guess that's it.  What do you think about all these types of Facebook posts? Do you think they can at any time be genuine?  Or do you think they're all just narcissistic bids for attention? Talk to me.

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