Tuesday, January 7, 2014

She's got Quasimodo eyes

I'll start this by stating that I'm running on 5 hours of sleep. I don't know what it is with my body, but when I go to bed at midnight, it always assumes that 5 am is a reasonable hour to wake up.

Yesterday I woke up with my left eye extremely swollen. I looked in the mirror and this is the first thing I thought of...


My eye doctor told me once before that it was clogged tear ducts and that I should use hot compresses and rub my bottom lid.  At first I was like, um, yeah, hot compresses? Whose got time for that? But when you look like Quasimodo, you make time. I almost didn't go to work, in fact, a friend told me I should 'call in ugly,' which I thought was brilliant, but I decided to suck it up and go in. When I got there I told everyone not to look at me because I was hideous.

Now, I've had this happen before obvi, but this time was way worse, so I thought, perhaps my eye doctor is a quack and I would really benefit from taking an allergy pill, just for good measure, and if it's not gone by tomorrow (which is today now, mind you) I would make a doctor appointment with my D.O.

I always know where my allergy pills are...except of course at this moment. I tore the house apart looking for them. A drawer even got organized in the ransacking. I know, contradiction, but that's me. I surmise I must have left them at the BF's house (he has dogs, I know, big step for me, but totally worth it). Not even an old bottle or packet of allergy meds lying around. Not even slightly expired ones.

So I've taken more time out of my last two days for hot compresses than I probably have to sleep. And then what happens...

...this morning I wake up to a swollen eye. Not as bad mind you, but still. It's never lasted this long, so I'm calling my doc this morning to see if it's clogged tear ducts as my eye doctor told me...or something more (cue ominous music).

This on top of my turbulent relationship with sleep makes for a grumpy Monday. I did a sleep study over the weekend. I'm really not sure how they can tell anything from those, I mean, how can anyone sleep right with a giant plastic pack strapped to their chest, a clamp on their finger and a tube up their nose. SMH. Anyway, I did it. We'll see if they come up with anything. But while filling out the paperwork there was a section that you had to put a # value on certain answers and it said if your answer go higher than 10 you probably had OSA (Obstructive Sleep Apnea).

I was reminded of this...


Except this one went to 12.

But I have to wait for the results to get back. If that's the case though, I hope I don't have to wear one of those freaky machine things that make me look like I have an alien clamped to my face...



...and I hope they don't throw more meds at me. I've read up. I could probably stand to lose a few pounds, avoid alcohol (HAHAHAHA), sleep on my side, avoid sleep deprivation ( again, HAHAHAHA), and my allergies may have something to do with it.  But I guess if I have to have an alien clamped to my face, it's better than dying in my sleep.

I had a few other annoyances yesterday, but we'll leave it at that.

How was your Monday?

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John Messina, Personal Injury Attorney

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