F³A: Heavy Heart

Do you ever have those days where you know everything is not right with your world, but you can't put your finger on it? I mean, I suppose I have plenty of reasons to have a heavy heart today:

• the gray
• the rain
• losing weight
• my nose hurts
• I have a big zit on my cheek that doesn't want to go away
• going indie on my next novel
• asking for money to go indie on my next novel
• being away from my boyfriend for 5 days
• coming to the realization that both my kids are driving which means I'm getting older
• disenchantment with the publishing world
• not enough time to do everything I want or need to
• slowly seeing my dream of being a full time writer  slipping away...

But today shouldn't be any worse than yesterday or the day before. Nothing has changed. Why all of a sudden do I feel gloom and doom today.

I think I'll just blame it on the rain *do NOT, I repeat NOT cue Milli Vanilli* Today the rain is loud, and though that may have helped me in my sleeping endeavors, it certainly isn't helping in my waking life. I think today I need some rainbows and sunshine and for this rain to go away.

Here are the Friday Scribbles:

Pandora Playlist Song:  St. Walker by Young the Giant.

Book of the Week: Um, I've been so busy, I kind of forget what a book is. Maybe next week.

Netflix of the Week: Desperate Housewives season two. Just started it last night.

Quote of the Week: "The heart has its reasons which reason knows nothing of. ~ Blaise Pascal  

Happy Friday all. Have a good weekend.

F³A: Here Comes the Sun

I live in the Pacific Northwest. I'm sure you all know that by now. This is what it has looked liked the past couple weeks.My mom just heard (or read, I don't remember) that people born in spring are more susceptible to vitamin D deficiency and depression. How do you like them apples, huh? My birthday is next month, so you know what that means!

Tonight, with Thing One and Thing Two, I head to where the sun almost always shines. Scottsdale, AZ. I've had short timers disease at work all week thinking about absorbing the Vitamin D, sitting by the pool, drinking margaritas. Two friends are already there, and will be picking us up at the airport tonight.

On top of THAT, I'm going to meet two writer friends! Amy Fellner Dominy and Taylor McCleve. I met Amy through the Class of 2k11 (before I got booted to 2012). I met Taylor through the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award Contest.

That is all except for the Friday Scribbles:

Random Pandora Song (Nirvana Station): Would? by Alice in Chains. Love!!



Redbox of the Week: Moneyball. Loved this movie. Brad Pitt, Jonah Hill, how can you go wrong? Plus, I love me some sports movies!!

Book of the Week: I'm reading two books at the same time, Velveteen by my buddy Danny Marks, and Okay for Now by Gary Schmidt. Both very different books, both amazing in their own right.

Quote of the Week: "In the sun I feel as one." ~ Kurt Cobain

Weather Identity Crisis

We need to put an end to this horrible climate change problem we're having. The weather in the Pacific Northwest, usually just gray and rainy is having a major identity crisis. Wind, rain, hail, sleet, snow!?!?! I mean, really? Snow? WTF?

Our poor little tulips and daffodils are trying to bloom and the skies keep dumping snow down on their freezing little bulbs.

Thing One's first tennis match is today...IN THE SNOW!!!!! Um, no, not watching tennis in the snow. Yes, I'll play the bad mom card today. We're all allowed a few bad parent moments, aren't we?

Please, reuse, reduce, recycle. Your footprint is too big for my PNW weather. In a couple years, I will be living in a tundra like climate. I'm not meant for the tundra. I'm meant for the sun with sporadic months of rain intermixed!

Think of the polar bears!!

Al Gore, I'm begging you, get your earth saving ass in higher gear!
God, stop toying with us, we get it, we're bad excessive people. Lesson learned!
And all of you who don't believe in climate change, get your heads out of your arses!! It's real. I'm feeling its wrath!!!
Ellen, Oprah, read my book!!! (sorry, I digress)

For the love of all that's good and pure, give me some effin' sun!!!

Monkey Madness Monday

Yep Monkey Madness Monday.  I don't have much for you today.  Had a busy weekend.  A long walk in the rain, two soccer games (one on an island so there were two ferry rides involved making it an all day event).  Not a good weekend for area sports.  Both girl's teams lost and my Hawks *shakes head*. 

Teachers are still on strike.  We're going to feel it at the end of the year.  Which as my older daughter says doesn't matter because the weather doesn't even get nice until July.

And I believe Fall is officially upon us, even though the temperature seems to be having hot flashes.  It was really humid here yesterday.  That mixed  with my own hot flashes doesn't bode well.

I didn't do my housecleaning like I wanted over the weekend.  Too much going on plus I've just been so tired.  And there's so much to do and the weather caught up with me.  A shed still needs to be built, a pool drained, There's a badminton set getting soaked and I'm afraid to move it because I'm sure there's a family of earwigs living under it now. sigh.

I need a vacation.  Maybe a weekend of solitude at the beach again.

Happy Monday all.

Monkey Madness Monday

So, it's Monday again.  It's been raining here for four days straight.  In the middle of July.  I mean, I know I live in Washington, but we usually get July and August sun.  This is ridiculous.  I bought a pool we've only been able to use twice, I left a bunch of crap outside on the last sunny day, not even able to fathom that rain was coming.  And I'm tired.  And cranky.  And frustrated. sigh.

I need to get rich so I can buy a place in AZ and hop a plane whenever the weather is like this.  I'm accepting donations (kidding).

On top of the rain, I just had a busy and frustrating weekend.  Teenage overload, one of which broke my elliptical.  I'm fatter than ever, I've GOT to get my ass working out and stop eating as if the world is ending tomorrow.  There were so many events I was supposed to attend it made my head spin out of control.  Did I mention the rain?  I had to drive about 30 miles to a soccer game on Friday, traffic was horrible, it poured down rain during the drive there, the entire game, and the drive home.

Even a Monday can't be as bad as all that.

At least I have cute monkeys to make me smile.

Monkey Madness Monday

So how cute is this little guy to the left?  I want one!!!!

It's Monday.  I'm in AZ.  Went to an SEO (search engine optimization) conference.  These guys knew what they were talking about.  This will not only help me at my day job, but with my writing life as well.

I leave today to go back to the lovely gray, rainy Pacific Northwest, apparently having missed the two days of heat and sun while gone.

However, I can't wait to get back and test out my new internet skizzizles.

Have a wonderful Monkey Madness Monday everyone.  Enjoy life.

Monday Morning Blahg: Battle of the Bulge

Why is it so easy to gain weight?  I've been trying for weeks to lose weight, I dropped nine pounds doing the low carb thing, and one weekend of eating a few carbs here and there and I'm practically right back where I started.

This weather isn't helping me any.  I get SO tired of exercising indoors.  When it's nice, I've been walking the Narrows Bridge, but the weather here has a constant identity crisis.  Yesterday was beautiful (I spent it doing yard work), today, rain. sigh.

I know if I want to drop the weight I'm going to have to get my ass on the elliptical, because you just can't depend on the weather here.  Seriously, I have like 30 pounds to drop. 

I guess I'd better get to work.

Thought Provoking Thursday: Moving

I swear the last couple years here in the PNW have been horrible.  It's been gray from September to May and we had no summer to speak of last year.  We have two season: Rain for ten months, sun for two.  And we don't even get rainbows anymore.  What's up with that?

This year, our weather has been having an identity crisis.  Like right now, the sun is out.  It's bright, shiny, and blue skies.  But in a few short hours, it's going to be pouring down rain according to the weather man, and I think he's going to be right.

It's impossible to know what to wear when you leave the house. 

This is the first year I've seriously debated moving to someplace with more sun.  Arizona mostly likely.  I would at least, if I make a mint, like to buy a house down there.  Just a tiny one with a pool where I can go for a couple weeks during the winter to get my battery recharged.

I'm not sure I can take another Washington fall/winter/spring.

Please let this book sell. 

Ciao,

Megan

Monday Morning Blahg: Eternal Rain

How would you like to see this for 8 months straight?

Yes, I know I live in the state of Washington where it rains the majority of the time, but the last couple years the sky has been gray for eight months straight.  I don't remember it being like that.  I remember sunny warm Septembers, and hot March and Aprils.  I don't like Climate Change.  I like the idea of Global Warming instead.

We had a little sun on Saturday and instead of taking advantage of it and getting outside to work on my yard I wrote.  Which was good because I hadn't written in awhile and I wrote a lot.  But now we're back to rain.

I have decided this:  I WILL be taking a vacation every winter for at least a week to go someplace sunny.  Probably AZ.  And I will SERIOUSLY consider moving someplace sunny when my children have graduated from college, or at least become a snow bird. (of course I can only do this if actually make money being a writer and can quit the day job.  of course, it is possible I can do my day job from home, but I don't think they would like that all too much)

Did you know that our state has one of the highest rates of depression and suicide?  It's true and it's because the sky is gray.  We're probably the state with the highest rates of purchases of vitamin D.  It's also why we were the the most wired city.  Because we had to stay inside so much people took to the internet like flies to shit.

I cannot wait to see the sun again.  I am after all solar powered.

Happy Monday Peeps.  Until tomorrow.

Best,
~Megan

Monday Morning Blahg: Procrastination = Missed Opportunities

Heeeeere's Megan

We finally had some nice (okay, decent) weather over the weekend.  The sun was shining, the birds were singing.  But guess what I was doing.  I was sitting in my living room working on my first pass pages.  Because I procrastinated and waited until the last minute. Sigh.  So I didn't get to finish this shoveling task I started, I didn't get my back patio cleaned up, or my planter boxes put in place.  I didn't get to go for a walk or a bike ride because literally from dawn til dusk (with a short Starbucks break) I was working. (All work and no play makes Megan a cranky butt)

Today it's raining again.

Muses

A lot of friends have mentioned their muses the last couple days, so I thought I would really sit and ponder where my motivation comes from.

I've always said that my craft mostly reflects life.  Sometimes I get story ideas from my own experiences, or base characters on people I know, myself included, but I need more than that.

The weather.  I know, it's crazy, but the weather has an effect on my mood.  I've always said I write better when I'm my most angsty, but thinking on it, that's not necessarily true.  I also write well when the sun is shining, it's just different.  I don't use as much emotion, I use more energy.  So this kind of yin yang weather thing is definitely a muse for me.

Music.  I cannot listen to music when I write.  I have to have things perfectly quiet and still.  However, music does pop into my head during certain scenes, and in my novel Mending Fences, and now in my WIP Finding Nirvana, music plays a major role.  When I was writing, the second novel I ever wrote, Dena Powers: The Trouble with Boys, there was one scene in which Snow Patrol's Chasing Cars kept popping into my head, urging me along.  Most the time the music is alternative or Indie because those songs just seem to speak to me.

My emotions.  As I said before, the weather directly effects my moods, and my different emotions help me to write in a variety of different ways.  I actually prefer to write when I'm miserable.  I just think I write better when I'm brooding, but there's something to be said for happiness too.

I suppose if my muse took form, this is what she'd look like (and do not make fun of my drawing).

So tell me, how does your muse take form?

We didn't blow our arms off...

We had a safe and fairly sane holiday weekend.  It was mostly devoid of sun, but of course it usually is here in the beautiful but gray and wet Pacific Northwest.

The girls and I came to the beach Thursday afternoon.  Traffic was fine, and the drive was okay except for the fact it was raining and rain + car = tired Megan.  But we arrived without incident, got settled then I took the girls our for dinner, and luckily their tastes still border on the simple, so they did not break the bank.  That night we had a mini 80's film fest with The Outsiders and Pretty In Pink, which I thought the girls would like since they had gotten into 16 Candles, Breakfast Club, and The Heathers (girls after my own heart)  They preferred the latter to the former and I'd forgotten how cute those boys were and how I was so in love with every one of them, especially C. Thomas Howell, Rob Lowe, and Emilio Estevez.

On Friday took them to see Eclipse, and since it was my favorite book of the series it only makes sense it was my favorite movie.  Taylor Lautner's abs were the star of the show and it didn't suck (haha, get it? Suck?) to look at the new vamp, Riley.  When we came out of the movie, the sun had miraculously decided to show itself so we hung out in the back yard, played badminton, and I bbq'd us some chicken, and it was good.

Friday night my sister and her kids came and we just chilled while watching Lords of Dogtown.  Which of course is the only way to watch Lords of Dogtown, if you're not chill, forget it.  Great movie btw, and I love Emil Hirsch and of course the late Heath Ledger.

Shopped around and laid in the sun all day Saturday.  Got the kids some pizza and my sister, her mother in law and I hit the casino.  Starship was playing (suddenly belts out *Jane, Jane, Jane!*).  We lasted about five songs as the wind was kicking and a glass of wine and Lobstermania slots were calling my name.  I dropped a $20 and it was good.

Then the grand finale, July 4th, the weather was crappy, like I said.  We just chilled, I made my famous (okay it's really Rachael Ray's) pesto pasta salad, we pretty much ate all day, bbq'd (I grilled the perfect hot dogs) then hit the beach for fireworks.  It was freezing, Thing Two and my nephew pretty much blew everything up while the rest of us bundled up in blankies or sat in our cars, and as soon as they were done, we were out of there.  I could not stay up for one more minute, so hit the hay.

Today me and the girls and whoever else wants to join us will take some garbage bags to the beach and help clean up.  Because sad as it is, people leave their trash for the tide.  Dead fireworks, bottles, cans, food wrappers.  We did the same thing last year.  It's a good lesson for the kids and we're doing our part, if only a little.

Hope you all had a great holiday.  I know I did.


Ciao,

Megan

The Sun

I know I blog about the sun way too much, but I'm solar powered.  Without it, I'm fairly useless.  Yes, I have my happy pills, yes I take vitamin D, but it's not the same.  A pill cannot compete with the big ball of fire in the sky, it's rays beating down on the pavement, filtering through my window, and hitting my face.

Yes, I understand I live in the Pacific Northwest, but we are normally allotted three months of almost uninterrupted sun. 

The picture you see here, I took from my living room window this morning.  It's what I've seen, not for days, but for months.  Rain streaked windows, wet sidewalks.  I thought last year was bad, the skies were gray from October until March.  Um, it's June people.  June when summer begins.  June when the sun is supposed to start shining.  June when I can sit outside under the sun and read a book, where I can start walking outside, when I take my laptop out to the backyard and write in the heat.

Yet, it's still pouring down rain and the sky is still gray. 

Leaving you with a poem I wrote about the sun.

White hot heat

Shimmering brilliance

Humid and inviting.

Filling vacuous voids,

The sinister chasms that

cause eternal downpours

and bone chilling rime.

Perpetual motion

Not to think or cast shadows

No moss collected

merely flow like the current.

Vivid hues, downy clouds,

fluid and weightless

blissful and tranquil

I wait for the dark to subside.

Ciao,

Megan

The elements: Air

I thank the rain for subsiding yesterday morning, but was it necessary to replace it with a typhoon.  Okay, that may be an exaggeration, but come on, what is this?  Adverse weather week in Tacoma, WA?

I appreciate the fact that without you I will die, like water, but when you kick it into high gear, you're kind of destructive and annoying.

The wind knocked two panels off my greenhouse yesterday putting all my poor tomatoes, basil, melons, and marigolds in jeopardy. 

It stung just walking from the car to the grocery store.  Yes, hindsight I wouldn't have worn the mini skirt, but the sun was shining so it was too tempting and misleading.

My kids called for a ride home from soccer practice three blocks away, it was blowing so hard .  Their skin was so cold when they got home because they did not put their sweatshirts on and I refused to pick them up because I already had dinner cooking. (what is it with kids and outerwear anyway?) 

At least unlike the rain you didn't keep my up all night.  I think you may have actually helped me sleep (or maybe it was overtired delirium from being kept up all night the night before).


Ciao,


Megan

The elements: Rain

Rain, I understand the earth needs you.  Plants, trees, and flowers need you to grow.

I understand that I would die without you.

But usually gray skies follow you and I can't stand gray skies.

And you kept me up all night with your pounding and storming and while I usually like that sound, I don't like it when I'm trying to sleep.

Okay, yes, I know I live in the Pacific Northwest, but this is ridiculous.  It's May and you could share a little more time with the sun.