F³A: Facebook Timeline

I don't get it.  I mean, didn't we have changes just like yesterday?  And now Mark Zuckerburg is changing it up again? *shakes fists at MZ*  

When I started Facebook I liked it because it was simple.  So splash.  No bells and whistles.  No tiny little boxes everywhere to mess you up.  I knew where things were.  It's kind of like someone going into your office and rearranging everything.  I'm like, WTF?  Where are my friends? Where are my statuses? Where is my sanity?  Oh, there it is, in a little box in the bottom left hand corner.

It's my own fault.  I decided to try it out.  I can play with it for seven days of publish it right away.  If I don't publish it myself they do it for me.

but Idon'twanna.  I want to go back to the way it was where everything was listed  neatly and simply on the left.  Where my friends were stacked like the Brady Bunch on the left.  Where that stupid scrolling whatsit that I finally got used to was on the upper right, and my chat the lower right, and all my shit was right in the middle.  Now everything is scattered everywhere and I can't find a damn thing.

So, does anyone know how I can go back?  CAN I even go back or should I just keep it because eventually we're going to be FORCED to have it?

If you already use Timeline, do you like it or despise it so much you want to fling your computer into the fireplace with your Duraflame log and extra Christmas wrap?  Tell me your thoughts on Mark Zuckerburg and his new Timeline.

Okay, time for the Friday Scribbles:

Christmas song of the Week: Little Drummer Boy/Peace on Earth.  I remember watching this on MTV when they still played music and falling in love with it.

Book of the Week:  I'm reading my friend Ian Healy's Just Cause.  You like superheroes?  Check this book out.

Netflix of the Week: Gray's Anatomy.  I like it.  I'm on season two.  The vet just came in.  He's hot.  I think it's Chris O'Donnell, but I haven't seen him since like 1989 so I'm not sure.

Quote of the Week:  "What can we take on trust in this uncertain life? Happiness, greatness,
pride - nothing is secure, nothing keeps (like our Facebook pages-I added that part). ~Euripides, Hecuba 

Happy Friday!

Sleepless in Seattle

Okay, Sleepless in Tacoma. For the last few years, I've had these spurts of sleeplessness, maybe two, three weeks at a time, followed by about a month of can't-get-up-in-the-morning-to-save-my-life. WTF?

I've never really tracked these weeks of sleeplessness, if they coexist with some form of stress, anxiety, or changes in life. If that were the case it would totally make sense right now. Things that are stressful, angst inducing, or have changed in Megan's life:

Holidays. mmhmmm. Here they are again. Presents to buy, baking to be done, lights to put up. Um, yeah, I've pretty much broken down for the last four years this time of year. Rock bottom here I come.

Option book. My debut book is almost out. Just over one month to go (panic sets in as I realize this). But wait, while I'm marketing the hell out of Never Eighteen, I have another book to write. Okay, I wrote it, it's done. But wait, there's more. Midway through I change direction. Now I have to rewrite it. And let me tell you. I've been less than motivated because I know it's a big project. At some point my agent is going to ask about it. (Actually she already has, told her done, just doing revisions, only a little fib). So, yeah, stress.

Book release. Parties to plan, reviews to worry about. The stress of wondering if it will sink or swim. I mean, yeah, of those who've read it so far, most have liked to loved it. But by US standards, that's a handful of people. Ugh!

Um, new relationship. This isn't stressful or angty. Its just a change in life. The most stress will come from introducing him to the kids, the rents, and subjecting him to the rest of my family at some point and hoping that's not a deal breaker. Otherwise, the relationship has been amazing.

Weight.  The never-ending form of stress.  I'm still down seven pounds, but my goal was twenty five by my release.  That leaves me with 18 to go and two 1/2 months left to do it.  Possible, yes, but I am weak when it comes to certain kinds of food and I must avoid them like the plague, which will be hard during the holiday season.

Work.  I love my job, but I've taken on more responsibility, and my partner in crime at work has other responsibilities.  And there are a few tasks that are frustrating the hell out of me.  I feel so far behind and I can't catch up.  I have to keep up with SEO, print ads, our newsletter, creating and uploading websites, helping plan the Christmas party.  All stuff I like to do, yet, I feel overwhelmed at times and am multi-tasking beyond my abilities.

So, when I wake up at 3:30 am, my mind will not allow my body to go back to sleep.  Anyone have any insomnia remedies?

F³A: Change

It's been a strange ride, this last few years.  From the most horrible things to the most wonderful things: depression, nervous break down, book deal, divorce, dating, winning friends, losing others, and amazing trips to Disneyland, Sundance, Arizona, New York.  Seriously, a tangible rollercoaster ride of life.

It's strange how our experiences in life can change us so dramatically.  They can change our feelings and emotions, our mental capacity.  They can change us physically (my changes added 25 pounds to me, which I need to get rid of STAT!)  Our experiences mold us into who we become.

I was once a submissive housewife.  Raising kids, cleaning, doing laundry, grocery shopping.  I was the ultimate soccer mom, a title I don't think I deserve anymore.  Life has changed me.  I'm stronger mentally and emotionally.  I still do the household stuff, I have to because now it's just me and Thing One and Thing Two.  I only have my kids half time. I miss them terribly when they're not with me.  I have yard work.  Lots of it, which of course can only be done when the weather permits, which is sporadic at best here in the PNW. I'm still a soccer mom, only the ultimate has changed.  I no longer help at practice, I basically run the money and buy the uniforms.  That part of it saddens me.

I used to screw around on Facebook all the time, and writer forums.  Now since I've divorced and had to get a day job, there's really no time for that.  I sometimes feel I'm losing those connections I made through my writing.  That I'm not there as much and I'll be forgotten.  I miss many of those people who I daily emailed, who made me laugh all the time.  Those who I flirted with.  But like I said, life and experience changes people.

Now I'm a marketing coordinator. That's my title at my day job.  And I'm damn good at it.  I've saved the law firm thousands of dollars a year already.

And I'm a writer.  But along with that comes even more, and I don't think people know how much.  We have to sacrifice our time.  Because along with the writing comes making connections, and hours of editing, marketing, and promotion.  Sometimes the latter takes so much time I don't have time to write.  In fact, I haven't written a new word in weeks. 

Yep, a rollercoaster.  Do I have regrets?  Of course, who doesn't.  But this is the life I chose.  My experiences have taken me down this path, and it's a path I want.

This is me.  Writer, Marketer, Promoter, Editor, Mom, Maid, Cook, Assistant to myself.

Sorry for the lengthy discourse.  It happens when I think too much.

I'll leave you with the Friday Nibbles.

Random iPod shuffle song (Thing Two finally found her iPod, well actually, her dad did): Nicki Minaj, Right Through Me.

Book of the Week: OyMG by Amy Fellner Dominy.  Starting it today.  I've heard it's wonderful.  Amy is wonderful in her own right.  She is a member of the Class of 2k11.

Netflix of the Week: I'm sticking with Arrested Development.  I just finished the entire series. A show that ended before it's time should have been up.  It's hysterical

Quote of the Week: "If nothing ever changed, there'd be no butterflies."  ~Author Unknown

F³A: 3rd Times a Charm

Today I'm going to court for the third time to try to get divorced.  First time I was missing a document (that could have been turned in later), second time the commissioner didn't like that I wasn't asking for child support.  I think I have everything covered this time.  I don't think I can take another rejection.

My marriage wasn't horrible, I mean, there were low points for me, but there were a lot of high points too, and there will always be a place in my heart for my husband.  Sometimes life just takes you in different directions.  I got to a point in my life where it just wasn't working for me any more.  That may sound petty, but there is much behind that statement left unsaid.  If you've been reading my blog for awhile, you probably know what that means.

I won't be celebrating this, it's not really a victory, it's just a change brought on by unexpected events.  We were married seventeen years (would be eighteen on July 2nd).  It wasn't an easy choice to make, but I felt it was one I had to.

So, here I go again.  Wish me luck.

Friday Nibbles

Random iPod shuffle song: Only Exception by Paramore

Movie of the Week: It's Kind of a Funny Story This is one of the best movies I've seen in awhile.  I rented it for research on my current work in progress.  I was pleasantly surprised.

Book of the Week:  I haven't decided what to read yet.  I've got so many books sitting on my shelf.  I think Illegal by Bettina Restrepo (who I absolutely love btw, we were fellow 2k11ers)

Quote of the Week: "We did not change as we grew older; we just became more clearly ourselves."  ~Lynn Hall