Tuesday, June 8, 2010
What to write next...
Thursday, April 15, 2010
41, 4.0

Another goal of mine is to improve my craft. Writing is a never ending learning process. There is always room for improvement.
So far,
I've been learning from friends and those who have generously offered to read my work. But I have books. I have Stephen King's book, On Writing. I have books on grammar and punctuation, books on how to develop characters and make your story better.I want to be the best that I can be. With that comes dedication, hard work, sacrifice, being open to criticism, surrounding yourself with people who inspire and motivate you, and understanding that you will never reach perfection.
Thanks for reading.

Kisses,
:*
Megan
EDITED TO SAY: My friend Jeff pointed this out. "Great writing takes a combination of talent and skill. Talent comes from practice; skill comes from knowledge. You can be a good writer with either/or, but you can't be a great writer without both."
He's so right, and I forgot to point out that while I want to learn more to perfect my craft, it also takes practice, which goes back to one of my other goals which is to write more. :)
Friday, January 22, 2010
F³A: Cliche Characters

Yes, Cliche Characters. A phrase I'm getting totally tired of hearing. I mean, cliche characters are just the people who are so over the top in real life, they stand out, right? What would Harry Potter be like without the Evil Wizard ( could also be Brought-Back-To-Life villain), the School Bully, the Chosen One, the Twins, I could go on and on.
I wrote a book about a high school shooting. Who are the people in your high school that stand out above the rest? The jocks, the cheerleaders, the gangsters, the brains? Yes. They are. The stand out because of who they are, because they are caricatures of themselves. What the hell is wrong with writing about people that stand out above the rest? Give them their own personality with a twist, and you have someone interesting to read about. Someone you probably know. Maybe even someone you are or once were. Characters to hate or connect with. I'd like someone to name me one book without a cliche character. And who gets to define them as cliche anyway? Is there a literary cliche character committee?
I'm venting here of course. I'm an amateur when it comes to writing novels. Do I need to read more about writing? Sure. Could I benefit from classes? Everyone can. (of course on a one income household it's hard to find the extra money to do that) But I believe in my talent, I believe I have stories to tell. I believe in myself and my cliche characters.
credit to http://risusiverse.wetpaint.com/ for list of cliche characters.
I'm done. Please feel free to chime in about this. I'd love to hear your thoughts.
Here's a poem for your reading pleasure (or displeasure, whatever :)
it pains
more than birth
or death
folds you in a box
in the dark
in the light
shining
shadowing
thrills
and
disheartens
it brings you to tears
it charms
it pleases
it makes and breaks
and reels and spins
it’s a top
a pendulum
a perpetual dance
to a beating drum in my ears
you want it to stop
but it’s vital
like air
and you know in the end
it can leave you
empty
or filled
and you say to yourself
it’s a risk
that’s worth taking.
Okay Song of the Week: The High Road by the Broken Bells
Movie of the Week: Avatar
Book of the Week: The Bum Magnet by K.L. Brady. I haven't read it, but looking forward to it
Quote of the Week: "We make up horrors to help us cope with the real ones." ~Stephen King
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Top four things I hate about Twilight. #2 *SPOILER ALERT*

My #2 is Breaking Dawn. While there are things I liked about the book, the series took a turn I really didn't expect, nor did I like.
I was in no way ready for Bella to become a vampire. And really, Bella: Weakest person on the face of the earth = strongest vampire ever. Protector of vampire and human alike. Phllllllltttttttt (that's me giving a raspberry). I bet the werewolves can still kick her ass.
I hate hate hated the whole Bella getting pregnant thing. And I doubly hate hate hate the name Renesme. Stupid stupid stupid.
The other disgustingly gross thing in the book is Jacob imprinting on the stupid baby. Icky. Yuck. Severely dislike. I'm sure I'm not the only one. This had to creep out anyone with a moral bone in their body. Can you say, pedophilia? Blech. Let's just treat Jacob like crap through the entire series and then make him wait eighteen more years for a mate. Jacob needs to find a new set of friends and his own book deal.
I suppose that's it. I'm sure I could come up with more if I really tried, but I'm not sure it's worth the time.
Thanks for reading, come back tomorrow for #1 (I think you can figure out what it is)
Kisses :*
Megan
Monday, January 18, 2010
Top four things I hate about Twilight. #4

Okay, so this week I tell you what I DON'T like about Twilight. My #4 is the writing.
While I enjoy the concept of the story, and I appreciate the fact that Stephenie Meyer tries to be very literary at times, it doesn't work for me. Yes, fancy words are pretty to read, but not a novel they do make.
Too much internal conflict with Bella, yeah we get it, you're weird, you're in love with a Vampire, yes, he's the most beautiful person you've ever seen, get on with it already. And she's just some plain no one, yet every boy in school wants her? Um, yes, I get that there's that "new girl" novelty, but someone as plain as Bella is supposed to be would not garner that much attention. Plus the fact that she's a total introvert, and putting off.
The characters are flat and not very interesting. They have no personality whatsoever. The only one with any depth at all is Jacob. Hence why he was included in last weeks blog. And I'm sorry, who in their right mind would not pick Jacob over Edward. He treats Bella with respect, he'd do anything for her, he's hot, he's human, he loves her, he's hot...need I say more? Not until book four (I think) do we get any insight the the vampire back stories. It at least makes Rosalie more interesting, not so much the others.
And Bella is a horrible role model for teenage girls. Constantly being saved by Edward. I mean, really, does someone really almost die that many times? She was very lucky to have a vampire boyfriend and a werewolf best friend. er. And really, putting everything in your life aside for a guy? A dead guy who seriously doesn't treat you that good? A guy who treats Bella like a possession and is borderline stalker (yeah, I come in your room and watch you sleep every night, can you say, creepy?). A guy who when he leaves you, you just want to die. Yes, this is not a good lesson for today's female youth.
Okay, I guess that's it for today. Come back tomorrow for my number three.
Kisses :*
Megan
Monday, January 11, 2010
Top four things I like about Twilight #4

Since Twilight is so very big, and I've never blogged about it before, I thought I'd better before it runs its course. I have a love/hate relationship with Twilight. There are things I really like about it, and things I definitely hate. So, this week is going to be about the things I like about it, next week, the things I hate. And I guess since they made a movie out of it and all, I'm going to be talking about the book and the movie.
#4 The concept
For those of you who don't know (and seriously, you should all know this by now, especially if you are a twilight fan) the idea from this book came from a dream that Stephenie Meyer had. A dream in which a vampire was in love with a human. Simple as that.
It's a great concept. Has it been done before, more than likely, though I haven't seen it. Of course there are many books about star-crossed lovers, but I can't think of any where one lover might literally devour the other. And I will admit this, Stephenie Meyer made me fall in love with the idea of the story (though maybe not the story itself). I won't get much more into it, because if I expand I won't have anything else to write about this week or next.
So that is all for today. Catch you on the flip side.
Kisses :*
Megan
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Top four things I desperately need/want to get done now that the holiday chaos is over

# 1 is REVISIONS. I'm beginning to hate the word. I might rename it Bob or something like that instead, just so it doesn't seem so daunting. I mean, can you say Bob and feel overwhelmed? I don't think so.
ABNA (that's Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award for those of you who don't pay attention) begins January 25th. That gives me another (give me a minute, I was never good with the maths) 18 days to get my novel, Lockdown,(which I wrote during NaNoWriMo, so there will be obvious flaws) as perfect as I can, AND write a pitch, which is actually a more difficult task than writing a novel.
On a positive note, I am on page 171, so, I'm more than half way there. Of course, when I'm done with this round, I'm going to have a couple extra sets of eyes look at it, then do another quick round of Bobs. (see that didn't hurt as much)
Once ABNA starts, then I want to go back and revise the rest of my novels, five in all. sigh.
That's it, come back tomorrow for the Friday Free For All.
Kisses :*
Megan
Friday, December 11, 2009
More writing
From my novel Rough Waters, a book loosely based on a cruise I took with my family earlier in the year. It's mostly fiction, some of the reality extremely embellished for entertainment purposes. Of course, some of it is entertaining without embellishment. To me at least. :)
The small crowd broke out in gasps, even me; though I’m sure my gasp had a completely different meaning then theirs. I’m sure theirs were gasps of surprise and enthusiasm, where mine was a gasp of fear and anxiety. A cruise involved my number three and number four greatest fears in the world, drowning and flying. They’re right behind something happening to my kids and spiders.
I sported a fake smile to blend in while my dad passed out vacation itineraries. I read the front page. A seven day cruise to the Mexican Riviera on Carnival Cruise Lines, departing from Long Beach in February.
“What’s the weather going to be like?” I asked hoping to at least rid myself of my Seasonal Affective Disorder for a week; the warm rays of the sun not having poked through the gray for months.
“It should be in the 80’s,” my dad answered. I let out a sigh of relief, albeit a small one.
My dad had given us a sixty-page packet of information about the cruise, being the obsessive, thoroughly organized beast that he is, with dress codes, shore excursions, on board activities, room amenities, and more. It’s overwhelming and I’m better at hearing information than reading it, so I handed the packet over to Sean without more than a glance. He sat and flipped through the pages, nodding his head and grunting from time to time.
Not only did I dread spending any amount of time on a plane or boat, but I also agonized over spending a week in a tightly enclosed cabin with my husband. Maybe agonize is the wrong emotion. Awkward would be more apropos. Just a couple weeks prior, my depression got the best of me and I told Sean I didn’t love him anymore. Though we were working through it, the wound was still fresh for him, and my issues, not entirely resolved. I hoped this trip wouldn’t be too much for us, the proverbial straw that breaks the camel’s back.
I didn’t know what my parents were thinking. Maybe they thought a family cruise would be just what we need to get the home fires burning again. Right. Spending six nights in a cramped cabin with four people, with the rest of the dysfunction in each surrounding cabin would a great antidote for marital problems.
I went to the kitchen and helped myself to a glass of wine. My mother followed me in. “What’s the matter Maura?”
“Nothing. Nothing’s the matter,” I lied, sipping my glass of Malbec and picking through a bowl of mixed nuts trying to find all the cashews.
“Well, you don’t seem too excited about the trip,” she said as if she’s hurt.
“There’s just a lot going on right now, you know, with the new meds, and the counseling, and all. I’m not sure this is the best time for us to start thinking about a trip.”
“Well sure it is. What you need is a little sun, a little romance. Your marriage will be right back on track.”
My mother, she always gives the simplest nonsensical answers to the biggest problems. I remember when in elementary school, I was having continual stomachaches. Any psychologist would tell you that’s a classic cry for help. That kids who are sick all the time are more than likely having problems at school. You know what my mother told me, she told me maybe if I cleaned my room more often, my stomach wouldn’t hurt all the time. Yeah.
“And by the way,” she said, “do you think that you and Sean could bottle up some vodka for us to take. They only let you bring wine on board, you know.”
I come from a long line of winemakers, my great-grandfather, my great-uncles, my uncles, cousins, yet I’m the only one in my immediate family who picked up the hobby. I have all the supplies I need to make and bottle wine, or make anything else look like bottled wine, including, corks, and shrink wraps.
“Yeah, sure, just bring a couple bottles over and we can do it.”
“Thanks hon,” she said, kissing me on the forehead, before heading back into the throng of energized family members.
With my glass of wine in hand, I took a seat back in the living room and waited for the excited murmurs and shuffling of papers to die down, and finally cease. I grabbed my coat, my purse, motioned for Sean that it’s time to go, said, “Thanks for the trip, looking forward to it,” and headed out the door followed by my family.
We kept silent half the way home. Finally, Sean asked, “Are you okay?”
I looked over at him, “Are you okay? With this trip I mean?”
“Sure, I think it will be fun, just what we need. I mean, I don’t think it’s going to work magic for us or anything, but I think we definitely could use the vacation.”
I studied him for a moment, wishing I could feel for him what I used to. He’s good-looking, compassionate, and working hard to save our marriage, but I had built a wall, a seemingly impenetrable one. I didn’t remember building it and I didn’t know how to knock it down. I wish I did. I would’ve liked nothing more than for things to go back to the way they were, when we were happy, and passionate, and deeply in love.
“I’m okay with it if you are,” I told him.
“I am,” he said.
“Then so be it,” I conceded.
Friday, November 6, 2009
Friday Free For All: A Little Rant About Stupid Crude Idiots on Facebook

I use Facebook for all sorts of things. I connect with friends who are scattered all over the country, I network for my writing, I play games. It's a fun thing for me. Something I enjoy (maybe a slight bit addicted to).
I have over 2,000 friends on Facebook. Some of this is for my writing, some for my gaming. So, I know some of these people aren't going to be a high class of people. But really, what makes a person think they can IM me and ask crude questions.
Here is an IM I received this morning from someone I don't really know, just play Mafia Wars with (don't judge me, everyone needs their fun):
Zaid
hi
5:15amMegan
hi
5:15amZaid
may i plz ask you something?
5:15amMegan
yes
5:15amZaid
thanx
mmm.. can you plz sit on my face?
Really? Come on. And when I ignored him, he said please. Needless to say, we are no longer Facebook friends. I get a lot of IM's about Mafia Wars, so I assumed that is what he was going to ask me about.
Do these people have nothing better to do than sit at their computers and sexually harass others? Get a life, better yet, get a girlfriend. Of course, these guys are probably so socially retarded no one in their right mind would date them.
I know, this is the risk I take having so many friends that I don't really know. But I should have a right to my fun without having to feel violated.
Okay, rant all done. Thanks for giving me an ear. Love you guys.
Song of the Week: Redemption Song (love me some Marley)
Movie of the Week: A Simple Plan (that is one messed up story)
Book of the Week: Twisted Tree by Kent Meyers (reading it for Amazon Vine, don't know how I feel about it yet)
Quotes of the Week: "There's nothing more dangerous than a resourceful idiot." ~ Scott Adams
"Is being an idiot like being high all the time?" ~ Janeane Garofalo
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Top Four Ways to Get Through NaNoWriMo: #1 Support

It is much easier to get through NaNoWriMo with support from those you live with. I'm married with children. I'm a stay at home mom. I have responsibilities. Cooking, cleaning, laundry, grocery shopping, etc, etc. I remember last year, thinking, I'm never going to be able to get this done. Yes, I do take time to write during the day, but I have to balance that with all the things I mentioned above.
However, unlike so many writers, I have a husband that supports my writing, and kids who are willing to help out with a little bribery.
I was AMAZED at how supportive my husband was during NaNo. He was cooking meals, doing laundry, let me write whenever I felt the need, or to finish up, or to catch up (I say let only because usually when he gets home from work, the writing stops and I hang out with the family).
See, and what if you have a day job? Then you have to write when the family is home, taking your time away from them. They have to be okay with this otherwise they will bug and pester and get mad at you.
Or you may not even be married, you may just have roommates. Will they be willing to keep the noise down so you can concentrate? Will they be able to leave you alone? Will they be mad if they hear your keyboard clacking away at 2:00 am on a Tuesday?
You may want to set the ground rules before Sunday. Tell whoever you live with what your plans are, and what it's going to take you to get there. Some days the writing will just flow and it won't take long to get your 1,700 in. Other days, when your muse is on a coffee break, or you're stuck in a section of book you just can't seem to get through, it may take all day. No matter, make sure those people in your life realize how important this is to you.
Okay, that's it for the week, tomorrow is free for all Friday.
Good luck with your writing.
Remember to register here.
And buddy up with me here.
Monday, October 19, 2009
Top Four Ways NOT To Gain Media Attention: #4
Okay, is some cases this will get you published. Probably the most famous fake memoir is James Frey's A Million Little Pieces. And really, if the writing is good and the story is interesting, you'd think it could get published on its own merit, right? Wrong. Breaking into the publishing world is difficult. Trying to make it in this industry myself, I can kind of understand the method behind their madness. If they couldn't sell their stories as fiction, why not try to sell them as non fiction, right? Unethical, yes. I wouldn't do it, but sometimes integrity wavers in the face of desperation.
And it's probably not worth all the trouble when you get caught. I mean, would you want to be reprimanded on national television by Oprah? Me either.
Some fake memoirs have been relabeled as fiction and sold, others are not so lucky.
Take Margaret B. Jones (really Margaret Seltzer) for example. She wrote Love and Consequences: A Memoir of Hope and Survival. This was supposedly the story of a part white and part native American girl, who grew up in South-Central Los Angeles, a foster child in a world of drug dealers and gang members. When it was found out that she was actually a rich white girl, the book was recalled by the publisher.
The Honored Society, by Michael Gambino was supposedly his story of life as a gangster as Carlo Gambino's illegitimate grandson. Gambino’s real son, Thomas Gambino exposed the book as fraud, and it was withdrawn by the publisher.
I could go on and on, but I won't. You get the idea. Lying about your life in book form is not always a good idea. Attention grabbing? Sure. In a good way? Not usually. James Frey is the exception, not the rule.
References:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fake_memoirs
Monday, October 5, 2009
Top Four Reasons to Join my Friend Gae's Facebook Fan Page: # 3
This is what she said when I told her I was going to blog about her fan page. "make me witty, and clever, and overall smokin hot. Oh, yeah, and I write well."
Her favorite phrase is "bite me" If she says it to you, she probably likes you. If she doesn't like you, believe me, you'll know.
Much of her funny is too racy to post here. Just sayin'.
Here are some funnies she posted on a forum we used to frequent.
"A crazy few months of my life started once by accidentally calling myself Gea. There was soccer and some nakeness involved. I can't go back there."
"I found a life for the last 24 hours. Don't worry. I've misplaced it again."
Honestly, I could go on and on and on, but you get the picture, right? So if you want to be witness to this brilliant insanely funny sense of humor, join her fan page. You should be constantly entertained.
If you're not, you're probably doing it wrong.
Top Four Reasons to Join my Friend Gae's Fan Page on Face Book #4

# 4 This is the most obvious. It's because she's getting published. Gae is a friend I met through the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award Contest. She has since become one of my best friends, though we've never met in person. Her YA book, Steinbeck, the Scoot, and the Pull of Gravity is getting published by a major press. No details yet, the details come later.
Here's a little taste of what it's about:
Nick Gardner is having a rough year. I mean, it's hard enough to be 14. Add to that your brother's a jerk, your big fat dad has hit the road, and your sort-of best friend is dying, and it's enough to wear you down.
But when a water tower, a broken leg, and a television news crew put Nick on a collision course with one Jaycee Amato -- a girl with Siberian Husky eyes -- his whole life begins to change. Together, they set out to deliver a gift for his dying friend.
Will they find what they set out for, or merely discover the beauty of Steinbeck, the crappy truth about plans and a few small facts about gravity?
Steinbeck, The Scoot and the Pull of Gravity is a coming-of-age story about first love, friendship, and the true nature of family.
So, support the arts. Become a fan.
You could also become a fan of yours truly, if you want.
Thanks for reading.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Random things I want.
I would like a garden without weeds, spiders, and other disgusting bug.
I would like all the computers and computer equipment in my house not being used to magically disappear, so I don't have to dispose of them myself.
I want a walk in closet.
I would like a storage room, shelves lining the walls for all my random crap.
I want to see Rome again.
I want my kids to be done with the monstrosity swing set in the back yard so I can get rid of it.
I want more hours in the day.
The ability to run.
I want to be 15 pounds lighter and have a six pack.
My own beach place.
One of the best agents in the business and a killer publishing contract with the biggest publisher in the world.
The ability to create a brilliant novel without having to edit.
That about sums it up. Maybe.
Monday, August 3, 2009
Top four BEST experiences in school: # 4 English Classes
Since I did the worst last week, I decided to do the best this week. This was a hard decision. But I decided to start with my favorite subject, English.Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Top 4 Worst Experiences of My Life: # 2 Depression
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Seclusion
New voice, hacking, cutting, omitting, adding. Hopefully by Monday, it will be a whole new novel.
I hope everyone has a safe and sane (okay maybe not that last part) Memorial Day weekend.
And don't forget to think about all those who lost their lives defending our freedom.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
My Bucket List
Number one is, of course, to get published. I think my current book, Mending Fences, has a shot. However, it needs a rewrite, which I will probably start on soon. sigh.
Number two, I have always wanted to dye my hair black, and think I will after next pay day. Trying to convince my husband it's just for fun and not to hide the gray has been a difficult task, but seriously, it's true. I've been wanting to do this since my late teens. I'm going to do it.
I would love to go back to Rome. I love Rome, everything about it. The history, the people, the food. I love that I can go to Rome and eat anything I want and not gain any weight because I walk everywhere. I love the fact that there is still a cheese shop that is seperate from the produce shop, seperate from the butcher.
I've always wanted to see Australia.
Meeting the friends I've made in ABNA. I mean for realsies, in the flesh. It's so hard to have these friends, some of the best friends I've ever had, and not be able to have coffee or lunch with them.
To excercise daily and get into the best shape of my life.
Most importantly, to leave my mark, be it as a writer, mother, friend. I want to be remembered, at least for awhile, as someone who made a difference, no matter how small that difference may be.
Monday, May 11, 2009
A bit of writing
Chapter One
“Come here girls, I’ll show you how to butcher a chicken,” the man said. A year ago, my children would have run away screaming at the thought. Now, it seems like a perfectly normal skill to learn.
“First thing is to cut the head off,” he says, using an ax and a tree stump to help in his task.
“Ew,” Lily, the younger of my two says at the sight of blood spurting from the neck and the chicken’s head falling to the ground. The man laughs at her revulsion.
He takes the chicken and hangs it by the feet on a fence post. “Next you want to cut the skin away. He proceeds to show the girls this new talent while they pretend to be eager to learn, in actuality hoping they will never have to perform this repulsive task.
I have known the man for approximately three months now, though I have yet to learn his name. He came to our rescue when The Scavengers came for my daughters. I couldn’t tell you what city we were in, but I know we had been there awhile, enjoying the new home we had come across with a well-stocked cupboard and swimming pool. It was always nice to find a house with a water source, be it a pool, a pond, or even a creek, water across the lands shut off for close to six months now.
Usually you hear them coming. They travel in packs of threes, honking horns, peeling out, screaming, raising a ruckus. They must have learned that stealth rather than intimidation makes for easier prey. We were sleeping, together, as we always do. I awoke to a filthy, hand smelling of a combination of nicotine, gasoline, and Vaseline covering my mouth. The girls screamed. The other two grabbed them and started hauling them off. I don’t know what they do to their prisoners, enslave them, rape them, eat them, but I was not going to let them take my girls without a fight.
I clamped down hard with my teeth; my assailant let out a howl and released his grip. I punched him in the balls, as he doubled over I used the palm of my hand to shove his nose into his brain as my husband had taught me ages ago. He collapsed, I don’t know if out of pain or death, but I was not going to stick around to find out. I grabbed my gun from the nightstand drawer, and ran outside.
The other two were almost to their vehicle with my girls, who continued to scream and struggle for liberation. I aimed my gun, but did not have a clear shot. One of them pulled out his own gun. I don’t know what kind, because I really know very little about firearms, having to teach myself to shoot. I just knew his was bigger than mine, and pointed at my head. I closed my eyes, awaiting the blast, praying to a God that I didn’t really believe in anymore, to let them kill my kids quickly. I refused to think of the alternative.
I heard the discharge and waited. I felt nothing. Perhaps there is a God after all. Another discharge. I opened my eyes. My children were running toward me, the two remaining Scavengers on the ground, tops of their heads missing, brains scattered everywhere. I scanned the area trying to locate our savior. He was climbing into a vehicle, a Hummer to be exact, about a block away. He pulled up right behind the Scavenger’s Jeep and began searching its contents, pulling out the things he found useful, loading them into the back of his car.
Wanting to express my thanks, I moved toward him, slowly. Although he saved us, I was still leery of his intentions. These days you can’t be too careful. I took a good look at him. He wore a plain green t-shirt, khaki cargo shorts, wool socks and hiking boots. He had a crazed countenance about him, hair a wild tangled mess, unshaven, dirty. He didn’t stop what he was doing. I practically had to run to keep up as I spoke. “I just wanted to thank you for that. I don’t know what would have happened to us had you not come along.”
He stopped, looked me in the eye. His eyes contradict his appearance. They’re soft, soulful, knowing, yet there are layers of pain and rage that lurk just beyond their deep blue beauty. They give away his age. At first glance I would have thought him ten to fifteen years older than myself, now I would say around the same age, if not a little younger.
He spoke, his voice firm yet understanding. “They would have raped and killed you, and because of the age and sex of your children, they would have used them as breeders.” I shuddered; he continued unpacking the Scavenger’s car, packing his own. I watched.
“Why wouldn’t they have taken me?”
He looked me up and down, and said, “You’re pushing too old to be a breeder, they only take men and boys to work, and you’re much too skinny and muscley to eat.”
“Why would they not want me for their queen,” I said smirking.
“Their queen!” he exclaimed, and then upon realizing I was joking gave a hearty laugh, causing his face to crack, making it seem like he hadn’t laughed in ages. There isn’t much to laugh at anymore.
He finished loading his car, hopped into the driver’s seat, started it up, and rolled the window down. “Bye,” he said, “Thanks for the laugh.”
“Wait, you’re just going to leave? You’re the first person aside from the Scavengers that we’ve seen in months. Let us come with you.”
“No,” he said simply.
I grabbed onto the side of his car and began to cry. “Please,” I said. I did my best, but my girls needed more protection than I could offer. And although I loved them dearly, I craved some adult companionship, someone to talk to about books, music, old movies, or how things were before the world ended. I wanted to hear his story, where he came from, where he’s going, who he’s run into, who he’s lost along the way.
“I’d take you, but the children are too much of a liability. The Scavengers would keep coming.”
“They’re strong; they’ve been through a lot. They know how to shoot a gun. Their dad taught them to fish, if you don’t mind baiting the hooks, they’re still a little squeamish of worms. My older daughter, Sarah, she tells great stories, very entertaining. And Lily, the younger one, she loves to sing, and has the voice of an angel. I’ll cook and clean for you. I’m strong too. I can gather and split wood, and garden, I’m a great gardener.”
He eyed me long and hard, up and down. I’m sure he was pondering what else I would be good for. It gets lonely out here. I can’t say the idea didn’t cross my mind either.
“Fine,” he said, shutting off the Hummer. “Let’s go get you packed.”
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Writers vs. Agents: Weighing In
This is true, no doubt about it. But, there are two sides to this coin that need to be addressed. Ours, the writer's, certainly, but we need to take a step back and take a look at what these literary agents go through also.
My job as a writer:
1. Write the best book possible, than edit said book until it's the best I think it can be.
2. Write a query letter that will wow agents.
3. Write a synopsis for those agents that require them (personally my least favorite part of the process)
4. Tirelessly research agents to find the ones that will be interested in your novel. Luckily there are websites out there like agentquery.com to help with such tasks.
5. Begin sending out queries. And when we do this, we have to change our beautiful query letter a bit every time to personalize it for whichever agent you are querying. Where they can send us form rejections, we cannot send form queries. Bad form.
6. Track queries sent with excel, or another great source, querytracker.com (thanks Ian for that)
7. Wait
8. Wait
9. Wait
Okay, those last three may be an exaggeration, in some cases. Many of those agents that take e-mail queries will get back to you within a couple of days. Some of course do not. Frankly, I don't know why every agent hasn't moved into the technology age. It's much quicker (maybe this is the problem) and it is better for the environment. I always begin with e-mail queries, and if those don't pan out, move on to those agents that still only take snail mail.
Okay, now that we've sent our queries, we start receiving rejections or requests. If you receive requests, you now have to customize your ms for each agent, as some want ten pages, some fifty pages, some three chapters.
If you are only receiving rejections, it's time to go back and revise your query letter to make it stand out from the crowd.
All the while we are doing the querying, most of us are either still editing the ms in question, or have begun a new project. So there you have it, the life of a writer. Forgive me if I've forgotten anything.
Okay, this is my take on the agent's job:
1. Receive query letter
2. Send rejection
That's it. Okay I'm just kidding.
1. Receive queries, which I'm sure they receive thousands a week or at least a month. I don't know for sure, someone can chime in here and tell me.
2. Read through queries and seperate the good from the bad. When I say good from bad, I'm saying, those that aren't well written, or those that don't peak their interest, or those whose subject matter, genre, etc, don't interest them.
3. Send rejections to those you don't want. At this point, form rejection is fine, you probably haven't even looked at the work, which is sad, because someone may have a brilliant novel, but be crap when it comes to writing a query. I also understand that because they receive so many, they don't have time to look at every single ms they get queries on.
4. Go through queries again and filter out more.
5. Send more rejections
6. Request partials or fulls on those that peak your interest.
7. Put those requested in a slush pile, get to them while you can because you are still looking through queries, attending conferences, reading your current clients new work, contacting publishers trying to get current clients a book deal, and reading through contracts of said deals.
8. Read through slush pile that never ends.
9. Find ones you like
10. Request edits
11. Sign to contract
12. Get to work on getting your new client published, all while still doing all of the above.
Okay, I'm sure that's generalized, but I can see where agents are busy, and can't read every piece of literature that every writer wants to send them. Plus, not every writer that sends queries are good writers, even though they think they are (I'm really hoping I'm not one of them).
What bothers me is the ones that do not respond at all. I know they are busy, but you have an assistant or intern that more than likely can send out rejections, don't you? Or, and even though I hate these, have time to press a button to send out a form rejection.
Also, if you request a partial or a full and end up rejecting it, this is where I think you could give a little more thought to your rejection. I don't mind hearing you didn't like the voice, or weren't drawn in, though I would like a little more insight as to where I went wrong. But please, at least, include my name and the name of my novel in the rejection. At least then I know you took the time to insert a little personalization into it.
Personally, I think agents are needed, especially if you want to be published by one of the big houses. Without them, your work will never cross the desks of Scholastic, Harper Collins, Randoms House, Penguin, etc.
Even many small presses require work to be agented.
So, can we really cast blame to the agents, when the publishers won't even look at your work without one? Can we blame them because they have to be selective in what they choose to represent? No. I don't think we can. Of course this means that some really great literature won't get published. This much is true.
I do think we should be able to expect a little more understanding and respect for the work we've done to query them. I think we deserve at least the 3x5 card saying, "sorry for the impersonal nature of this note but..." I mean, when they query a publisher for a client, I'm sure they at least get a nice letter saying, "sorry, but..." Shouldn't we be able to expect that much in turn?

