So, Thing One tried out for select soccer. And you know how I've ranted about select soccer before. This is the team she was on last year. They have an A and B team. Last year she made the B team, which we were disappointed with, as in our personal opinion she was better than a few other players who did make it, but had the pleasure of being pre-acquainted with the coach prior to try outs, i.e. favoritism. I LOVE favoritism (note: sarcasm)So, anyhoo she tried out again this year, and once again they have an A and B team, and she has been kicking some ass on the soccer field this year at practices, on the school team, and in indoor. I would venture to guess, in her last few years of playing soccer the girl has scored twenty to thirty goals between the three teams. But guess what? Again, she didn't make the A team.
This frustrates me for a few reasons. First, again, she deserves it. Second, she was one of only a couple forwards trying out for the team. Third, coach was scrambling for players so he invited some girls from another team that folded to come to the practices and all of them made the team. He invited them to practices AFTER try outs were already held. THEY WEREN'T AT THE TRYOUTS AND THEY MADE THE TEAM. AND, my daughter scored two goals against them in indoor last week. Fourth, it just sucks and made my kid cry. 
To add to it, one of the girls on the A team last year whose dad helps coach the team told Mary she had made it. That was just wrong and stupid and hateful.Now, I don't really care which team my girl plays for as long as she plays. I love watching her on the pitch. Her passing is brilliance, her crosses, near perfect, and of course I am full of pride when she scores, and love to see how happy it makes her. I'm upset because she's upset. And I REALLY don't like it when people hurt my kids.
I'm so mad, I don't even care if they read this blog and he will be getting an email from me today.
Okay, my rant is over for now. Since this is the Friday Free For All I'll leave you with this weeks favorites.
Current song on my iPod: Fake Plastic Trees by Radiohead
What book is on my nightstand: Greyhound by Steffan Piper though I'm currently still reading Alchemy by Mike Wood. These should both be on your bookshelf.
Current watch: Dexter Season One. Watching it on Netflix. Liking it.
Quotes of the week:
"I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?" ~ Bill Watterson
"There is always inequality in life." John F. Kennedy
Sigh. The politics of kids' sports. I'm sorry :-(
ReplyDeleteOn a positive note - hope you love Dexter. First season was great but this last season...unreal.
I would be really annoyed. Has the coach seen her play other than tryouts? Furthermore, why is there even an A team and a B team? Why not just have 2 teams and make it a random thing who winds up on what team. OK, that's just me because unfairness annoys me too.
ReplyDeleteMegan, I really think you should ask the coach face-to-face. It's a fair question and not just some venomous parent making waves. Maybe if you confront him, he'll think twice about flinging that ol' favouritism around!
ReplyDeleteBill Watterson's quote made me lol.
xo Barbara
ugh, i'm sick to my stomach over it. and I know some kids make it and some don't, but mine deserved it, and we're finding out other things that are just ridiculous as far as all this goes.
ReplyDeleteand I plan to confront him, by email. I am much more articulate on paper than in person. i'm like a stuttering fool, esp. when i'm mad, and on paper I can write it, think on it, change it, before I send it.
Dawn, I am really enjoying Dexter. Thank you. :)
Oh, and Alissa, to answer your question, yes, the she played for this coach last year, he's been to her indoor games, he's been to her school games. He's seen her score, pass, etc.
ReplyDeleteIt makes no sense to us at all.
I HATE HATE HATE that politics ever enters the kids' sports arena! It is SO WRONG! I am fine with favortism based on 'this kid worked her ass off and that one sat, so even though that one is a little better, this one gets the spot'--that is okay with me. But that coach was just plain WRONG to put anyone who wasn't at tryouts above kids who were. I would complain over his head--seriously. Maybe wait for the end of the season, so your daughter doesn't suffer consequences for it, but I would go to the organization and bang some heads.
ReplyDeleteIdeally I'd also look for a different team next year--don't know how much of an option that is, but it sounds like the one you are working with isn't playing fair, and it is your right to find one that DOES.
[Mama bear mode is something we all have to do, and your girls are lucky you are willing and able]
If I had thought for a second she wouldn't have made the A team, I would have had her try out for other organizations. I think it definitely came down to politics, but also some bartering, like coach of B team saying, fine I'll coach but you have to give me a couple good players. After finding out a couple more kids who made each team, there was at least one more I felt got the shaft and who is none too happy about it.
ReplyDeleteI guess it comes with the territory, but she does love this team, enough that though she's unhappy, she's content to stay with the B team.
When your child is hurt or disappointed it just makes you want to die. And when it is unfair it makes you want to spit fire. Our son had a similar thing in high school with a school musical when he did not get a lead part we felt he deserved. His heart was just broken. Cut to: two days later he is fine and thriving in the chorus and my husband and I are still bitter and tearing up at the mention of the play!
ReplyDeleteOh and I need to add-STICK WITH DEXTER. OMG. This last season. Unreal.
ReplyDeleteHa, thanks Deb. I know I think the kids get over it much quicker than we do. We've talked about it. She doesn't want me to send the email I was going to send. We've talked about the other girls on the team, and they are actually for the most part, a talented group of players.
ReplyDeleteAnd thanks for the advice on Dexter. I am thoroughly enjoying it. :)
Our TV has been disconnected for a while. A fried at work suggested I watch "Dexter." It is a cute series, he says.
ReplyDeleteSo, the family gathers around the computer as we bring Dexter up. It looks like it has potental.
OMG I release too late this Dexter is a lot different from the "Different Strokes" cute cudly Dexter lol. All of a sudden a lady gets murdered in the bath tub.
Good lluck watching. Scary stuff.
Yep, scary and not appropriate for children.
ReplyDeleteThat really sucks, Megan. I'm sorry for her (and you). And I don't get it. Why isn't talent and ability recognized in a uniform way? What did the coach say to your email?
ReplyDeleteFor a different take on soccer, yesterday my six year old was looking up at her trophies and asked, Why did I get those, mommy? I'm no good at soccer.
Someday I guess it's gonna switch from the everybody-gets-a-trophy-lest-their-poor-wittle-sense-of-self-esteem-suffers. Maybe she'll be good by then.
I never sent the email. I'm waiting to see if I hear from him. To see what he says. My daughter doesn't want me to send it.
ReplyDeleteWe think that maybe we're saying something without saying anything because I know they know what they've done and would probably expect it from us.
We're going to let it ride and see what happens.
My daughter, she's strong. Stronger than me. We talked it through, and though she's disappointed, and still jokes that she must have heard wrong, we've looked at the upside of it.
She just wants to play. The guy taking on the coaching of the B team (if it's who we think it is) is disciplined and expects much out of the girls. The girls on the B team are actually a very talented group for the most part, and we can see them being a very good team. We also think that maybe Mary was used as a bargaining chip to make a decently strong B team (among a couple other girls).
So we just go with the flow, and next year, we try out for other teams so that if she doesn't make the A team next year, we have other options. Because she will NOT play for the B team again.
Megan,
ReplyDeleteMy kids weren't athletic, and neither was I, but I do wonder about one possibility. When I was studying modern dance as a child, the teacher always put me in the group that was just below my ability. She explained to my mother that I -- an underachiever -- needed the psychological boost of being the BEST in the group. It's also possible that the coach needs her as a leader in the B group. Just some thoughts. I don't really know anything about it....Jody
Well, that's kind of what I was saying when I said perhaps she was a bargaining chip. It wouldn't be so much for her, but for the coach, the team. My husband and I thought maybe they needed someone to rally the team around, and my daughter, plus one of the other girls who I felt should have made the team and didn't, would be the two perfect options as a backbone. They have the talent, the attitude, and the qualities to be good team leaders.
ReplyDeleteSo, it's something to consider anyway. I think it helps make sense of it all.
We are currently going through the same thing with our child. I find it amazing that several kids don't show up for the tryouts and are guaranteed a spot. Others don't sign up on time but are still are allowed to try out and probably will make the team. They bring in some people at tryouts to review the kids (in addition to the coaches) this is their way out. They expect kids to show good sportsmanship on the field and to respect one another but the adults break all the rules and just end up hurting those kids that have their heart set on just playing soccer. My child is devastated over this. One child didn't show up to tryouts because she was at a party but she will make the team. Life is not fair and it is so hard to tell your child that even though you followed the rules and others didn't - you didn't make the team.........
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